


All Over Again

by blankdblank



Category: Real Person Fiction
Genre: Accidental Bonding, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Declining Health, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Roller Coaster, Fighting Through, Filming, Made up BTS, Mentions of Cancer, Missed Milestones, Oceans 8 - Freeform, Pushing through, Travel, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-08
Updated: 2019-06-08
Packaged: 2020-04-12 14:48:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 17,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19134256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blankdblank/pseuds/blankdblank
Summary: A friend decides to help out another by setting up a meet for an equally as heartbroken friend when the two are set to work together. One assumed date later Friend #2 is scrambling to repair the damage. Joint struggling struggling paths lead to unintended bonds that ache to never be broken when facing the future alone. Secrets are kept, doubt raised, and suddenly revealed to test their newfound bond.





	1. Chapter 1

“Just go and have a cup of coffee.” Again you mumbled it to yourself on your way from your car to the door of the cafe you were tasked to meet the literal man of your dreams.

Of course now couldn’t be the worst possible time for this, sure it had been ten months since you had, in a single week, lost two of your baby brothers before finding out you had been a massive joke to your former fiancé. Two years he had a woman on the side and heavily pregnant she showed up at the door looking for him, while he was off at work, with bags packed forcing his decision to finally live together.

An hour was all it took to pack up what you called yours into your car and drive off to anywhere but there after ensuring she had been fed and settled into your former spare room. The plus being that everything big and bulky mainly was in his name leaving just the small portable items as yours and easy to move. A couple of calls later you were able to drive a few towns over to a cousins for the night for a restless few hours laying down trying to silently sob about the insult on top of your excruciating week.

By weeks end you had driven out to your father’s home where you stayed through the painfully televised funeral where the full arrival and knee to the groin from you your ex got when he tried to enter the church and hug you before he was sent away by your relatives. Sure you weren’t the first to be cheated on, but after hearing since your accident when you were a child your single ovary, for most doctors, labeled your chances of conceiving slim to none only worsening things.

Two years, by her reckoning he had gone to that club and sat for speed dating the very next day after you shared the news he swore didn’t matter to him for how deeply he loved you. Obviously it did matter and so forcing your head down you grit your teeth through interviews for the tv show you were currently on through the questions on relationships until they got back to the show. A whole year you had nearly made it and signed on to a film through your move to England of all places along with some of your idols and a heart throb you had joined millions in pinning over for years now.

That film also came along with filming for a first season to a spin-off of the show you had just left, that was all too greatful as one of the fan favorites for your name to add to the roster. Alone you would be out here in this amazing country full of new chances and one of your acquaintances, Benedict Cumberbatch, who you had met on another of your films a few years back, said he had a few friends. One especially also having a hard time he wanted to introduce you to, not as a set up he solidified, just as a friend, who you happened to be working with, Richard Armitage.  _“A chance to have a friendly face at work and in town if you wanted some company to a film or something. Just friends.”_  He again expressed, so off to coffee you went, silently hoping for the best.

..

 “Why the hell does he assume I need to be set up on a date in the first place…” Groaning lowly Richard furrowed his brows as he stood beside his car smoothing his hand over his t shirt, plain and clean over his least wrinkled jeans he’d dug out of his pile of clothes in the closet he’d neglected to clean since his mother’s health had been taking a turn for the worst. A girlfriend was the last thing he needed right now, even with her insistence for him to try and be happy. Though he had never imagined his life without her and didn’t care to know what it would be like, and though he wanted a family he couldn’t think of all she would miss without bursting into tears once again.

.

Begrudgingly he stood with arms crossed with hat tilted downwards, against the post outside the café he was tasked to meet you at, pleased he had dressed casually spotting your familiar figure from the picture he had been sent earlier. Dark curls in a high ponytail with a simple t shirt under a baggy green cardigan and jeans over scuffed boots. Weakly you smiled at him saying as his arms dropped, “Hey.”

Flatly in a failed try at a cheerful tone he replied, “Hello.”

Shifting your shoulders to the door you asked, “You, um, anything good here?”

He shook his head and shrugged, “I wouldn’t know. Ben chose the place.”

You nodded him joining him in the walk to the quickly filling café, “Oh, right.” Wetting your lips trying not to cry at the wafting scent of chocolate muffins freshly baked, your favorite treat to share with your brothers from the hospital cafeteria. “Your, um, day go well? I heard you just came from Tokyo?”

He nodded and then sighed, saying probably much colder than he intended to, “It was long. Honestly being set up like this is the last thing I wanted.”

Unable to help it any longer your eyes filled with tears and you stated while a group of teens walked in freeing you to slip out after stating as cheerfully as you could with a quivering lip, “Well I hope it gets better for you.” Then you turned and walked back out heading straight to your car.

Sighing flatly Richard glanced up at the board grumbling to himself while he made his choice before glancing down at you trying to think of anything to say only to feel his mouth fall open at your absence forcing him to turn and scan the people around him then he went outside again. Across the lot he eyed the spot where your car had been and he mumbled, “Fuck.” Reaching up he wiped his mouth and groaned internally walking back to his car where he gripped the wheel tightly grumbling again, “Fuck, fuck, fuck.” Starting up his car for the drive back home again, “Last thing I wanted, subtle, very fucking subtle. Might have well have shoved her away from me or thrown hot coffee on her. Last thing,” he groaned again, “Why the fuck did I say that?”

.

 

Inhaling shakily you parked back in your driveway and walked to your door of the cottage you were renting you unlocked and opened reaching inside to the coat hook for the leash there, “Gimli, want to go to the park?”

Eagerly the reddish brown and white speckled Springer Spaniel trotted to the door and wagged his tail in his posing halt for you to hook his leash on his collar then closed and locked the door again remembering the day you helped your brothers pick him out as a puppy from a neighbor’s litter. Though not fully red he grumbled and puffed his chin fuzz out reminding the pair of the lovable grump of a Dwarf and the name stuck. He was miserable, as you were the worse they got and barely moved when they were gone, just laid in bed with you and your foul mood until you went back to work taking him along with you, spurring on the addition of a dog for your character when he would wander randomly into the scenes you were in.

A few blocks over you found the park and smirked guiding Gimli along the trail, trying to imagine the boys racing alongside you in some pretend battle with sticks miming bows and swords. At barely seven when they died the loss was so much worse for what they could have achieved, both admiring your job in acting, what they had hoped to be. But your mind snapped from that to the Chocolate Spaniel that had darted over to Gimli stirring your grin deeper as he wiggled around your legs with a tall blonde trotting after him. A weak chuckle left him when you passed him back the leash he had dropped, “Morning. Thank you.”

You shook your head, “Not a problem, Bobby’s looking chipper today.”

The bright blue eyes of none other than Tom Hiddleston landed on your face with brows ticked up before you giggled stating, “Ben sat for him last week when I moved here, him and Gimli bonded quickly in my night over waiting for my keys.”

He drew in a breath and grinned stating, “Jaqi, right, Ben actually was planning on setting up a lunch, or something.”

You rolled your eyes brushing your side swept bangs behind your ear that had blown across your face, “You really don’t have to do that. No matter how pitiful he made it seem I am out on my own.”

He shook his head after another weak chuckle, “You are far from pitiful. I greatly look forward to getting to know you better and planning more walks for our dogs, no wonder Bobby has been so blue.”

Making you giggle and nod, “I know Gimli would love that. He tends to get bored with just heading to my sets and laying on the side. Have to add a few passing scenes from time to time.”

Tom nodded, “Yes, I hear from Ben he made quite a splash on your old show. Even has a spot on the new one. Well done.”

You giggled again, “He just strolls through anyways. Had to.”

Tom chuckled again then sighed pulling his ringing phone from his pocket, “Ah, speaking of work. I am supposed to go do a stint with James Corden.”

You nodded and giggled, “I hope you get Believe.” His brow inched up and you smirked, “By Cher. I had a dream of you dancing to it in costume before.” Making him laugh, “Trapped in the glass prison in Avengers, disco ball pops up with light up floor and all. They eventually let Loki go free.” Making him laugh again as you giggled and glanced away for a moment, “I know, awkward to hear of dreams about your characters. And probably you’re sick of hearing of people wanting to hug him, but I really do, as awkward as that is from someone you’re being set up as friends with.”

Chuckling again he nodded and shifted his weight on his feet looking you over as if memorizing something, “I love he gets so much affection, and I look forward to hearing what other interesting dreams your mind has crafted on our lunch. I will pass on the hug you offered.” He said patting his hand onto his chest in his back step at your next giggle and turn before you could blush at his wide smile in his pulling out his phone at its next ring.

“Enjoy your karaoke. Bye Bobby.”

He smiled at you again after your glance at Bobby, patting him on the head, “Enjoy your day, pleasure to meet you both and I will see if they take requests. I will see you later.”

You giggled again, “See you.” Turning away as he did, facing the path ahead missing his next glance back at you before chuckling to himself unable to help but hum the song to himself imagining the scene you had dreamt up looking forward to knowing what else you could dream up.

Alone again with your thoughts you wondered what could have made Richard so worn down past the long flight back to have Ben imagine your company could ease his troubles. Something about his demeanor rang familiar to your past slump making you groan trying not to absently stroke your bare ring finger where the ring you used to spin. Nearly a year and you still struggled to remember it wasn’t there, missing the ring’s presence more than what bond it stood for and the man who had offered you that lie. Eventually your mind wandered to your first day on set and hoping you would be able to be friendly with your fellow cast members, mainly Richard, the giant prickly bunny you were tasked into being friends with.

Home again you laid out on your couch with Gimli laying on your stomach scratching his ears between garbled questions and comments to him in his pleased grumbles until you got up to start dinner you set at the table with his bowl on a placemat in the chair beside yours. After your meal and one sided conversation with the grinning dog staring at you happily between bites you cleaned up and went to bed where you curled onto your side wrapping up in your blankets forcing yourself not to cry at the lack of a body to wrap around you or to wrap around. Clearly an obvious pain due to Gimli’s climb under the side of the blanket to wiggle into your arms only to relax into sleep at your wrapping around him.

.

At his flat Richard pulled his phone from his pocket when it rang and he groaned seeing Ben’s contact pop up, wetting his lips he picked up the call answering, “Ben.”

 _“You canceled?”_  Richard’s lips parted in shock and he listened,  _“That long of a flight? You are at least going to try again soon?”_

“Ben,” he sighed, “You know about my mum, now is not the time for me to date anyone.”

 _“Date?”_  A groan sounded through the phone,  _“Richard, it wasn’t a date. You weren’t listening at all were you?”_

“Why else would you send us to coffee, alone?”

 _“I’m in France for a week and Sophie’s in Italy. Honestly, Rich, Jaqi is the last person I would set you up with.”_  That sentence stabbed at him deeply as to why his friend thought he was unworthy of such a stunning woman no doubt incredibly amazing once he actually gave you the chance.  _“Ten months back she lost two of her brothers,”_ parting Richard’s lips,  _“And not three days later she found out her fiancé had a mistress for nearly their full relationship. Trust me, I am absolutely not going to be forcing either of you into a relationship. But she just moved out here and I figured, you especially could meet her and get to know one another-,”_

“Ben, I get that we’re going through something similar-,”

_“Rich, she’s got a role on Oceans 8.”_

“Oh.”

_“Ya, She’s new to town, bit of a wallflower at first till you get to know her. I figured it would be nice for her to have a friendly face.”_

“Ya, I’ll um, try to reschedule it soon.” He said hearing the little girl calling for her father over the line. “I’ll um, be sure to, order extra muffins.”

 _“Just make sure they’re not Chocolate.”_ Richard’s brows pressed together,  _“That’s what she ate at the hospital with them.”_ Parting his lips again remembering the fresh batch being set out when you walked in.

“I will remember that.” Hoping deep in his chest it wasn’t what he said to have sent you away from the café. “Go see Lily and give her a hug for me.”

A chuckle sounded,  _“Will do. Get some rest, and make sure you’ve got something clean to wear, I know you’ve barely been home so tidy up.”_  Making Richard chuckle and lower the phone after it hung up.

.

All the way to morning he cleaned and did laundry between traded messages with his mother, father and brother until his dinner alone he tried to focus on the screen to avoid looking at the empty chairs around him again. Breakfast rolled around and lazily a bowl of oatmeal was fixed up as he stared at his phone trying to word the message he wanted to send you. Eventually he sent you a simple, “Morning.”

Groaning to himself he eagerly eyed his phone when your reply over a raisin packed bowl of cereal was crafted,  _“Morning. Feeling better? Last time I flew from Tokyo it took me two days to bounce back.”_

Wetting his lips he answered, “It wasn’t that bad of a day. I wanted to apologize. I had no intention to run you off.”

_“No worries. Didn’t want to make things worse. Ben’s already set up blind friend meet ups with a group of his closest out here all week. I hated forcing it on you but he’s a bit relentless.”_

“You aren’t forcing anything on me. Ben said we’re going to be working together, I’d like to get to know you better, I would, even if we weren’t.” After finishing his bowl he wet his lips to add, “Care to try again? I know my usual spot makes a great mochaccino.”

 _“Oh,”_  his heart skipped assuming your refusal,  _“Well I have to take Gimli for a walk, but after we can.”_

Wetting his lips he said, “I, could, join you, meet you with coffee.”

 _“If you like_.” Giving him the time and park before dressing and leading the bouncing dog to the door after his hearing the fabled ‘w’ word. Chuckling weakly you headed out and tried not to blush again at going to meet the brit.

.

With narrowed eyes at Gimli after stroking his back Richard straightened up then looked you over all but freezing at your wide smile and soft giggle averting your eyes, “He’s not all red, it was more about his behavior when my brothers picked him.” At that his eyes snapped to yours and his grin dropped as you sipped on the drink he’d brought you, “I take it Ben told you about my vortex of a year.”

Richard wet his lips, “Yes, he, mentioned it.”

With a grin you peered up at him, “They loved meeting you, you know.” His brows inched up and you pulled out your phone showing him the pictures of the twin boys with purple eyes matching yours with knit caps on a tour around Hobbiton they had gotten on a make a wish trip with a few of the cast they had chosen. A chuckle left him as he remembered that day, “Oh they spent hours trying to set you, Lee and Luke up with me saying I needed-,”

Richard chuckled out, “A King for the castle you were building.” He chuckled again, “Lee gave them his email.”

“I thought that was fake. They used to send doodles to him they made on the tablet I got them.”

Richard grinned at him, “Yes, that he shared with us. I loved the one with Thorin with the ax at the end of his long beard.”

You giggled again as you started to walk again, “Thank you, by the way, they loved New Zealand, you must have a lot of those-,”

He shook his head, “Myself, not particularly. I know Martin did quite a few, Lee, Ian.”

“Aww, Thorin needs some more love.” He chuckled again, “If it helps they made me swear-,” he looked at you in your pause to nip at your lip when your voice wavered, “If I ever have a son, to name him Thorin.”

“Ooh, now that is an honor.” Chuckling lowly eyeing you again. “Hard day?”

You glanced up at him forcing a wider smile, then shook your head, “It’s, a day. Sunny, somewhat, at least for Gimli’s sake, hates mud stuck in his fur.”

Wetting his lips he asked, “Just, to be clear, the ex, is it a bury it and walk away topic, or do you need to vent, or,” he sighed, “I have no clue, I just don’t want to ask anything, possibly painful.”

You let out a wry chuckle, “Well, we were nearly together shy of three years, I think he just, I don’t know, instead of breaking it off proposed, cuz, that’s just what you do next.” He looked you over again, “There’s um,” inhaling again his brow rose at your short pause, “when I was ten I was out in the tree house in the woods behind our house out in the woods with my older brothers. There was a storm, hit suddenly.” 

He nodded as you wet your lips, “The tree got torn out of the ground. We were all beat up, but, I ended up losing one of my ovaries at a gash to my side. I barely, the night after I told him it wouldn’t be likely for me to have children he signed up for speed dating, met his mistress. She showed up, just out of the blue after months of his stalling on moving in together, found out why when I answered the door. So I packed and left, helped her set up her things and told her which room would be best for the nursery.”

Softly he repeated as you sipped on your drink, “Nursery?”

You nodded, “She was seven months along.” His lips parted when your eyes met his, “It never matters at first, but it always does. I can’t promise anyone a family on my own and I certainly can’t just keep it to myself, in case they have plans of their own.”

“Still, you don’t deserve that.”

With a playful smirk at him you stirred a grin onto his face asking, “So, spill it. Childrens names. Is there a miniature Crispy in the future?”

Making him chuckle as you sipped on your drink through his imagined list of names he’d always preferred for the rest of the walk ending at your place for a cup of tea you fixed the pair of you through sharing about what you knew of your role so far.

With a giggle you replied, “I, um, I don’t know much. I’m one of those silent but deadly types, off to the side from the first script. Supposedly I’m Helena’s sister, off to greener pastures after her designing career tanked, maybe there will be some drama after.”

“Ooh, nice. From what I can tell I blackmail and framed Sandra’s character for a heist.”

“Ooh,” Your playful smirk made him chuckle, “I love it when you play the villain. Goes against that marshmallow center of yours. Makes me hate to hate you.” He chuckled again as you sipped on your tea pleased to see him smile fully.

“When do you fly out to New York?”

“Day after tomorrow. Dad’s got a penthouse out there he sent me keys to for the filming. I might not have lines yet but for however long they need me I’ll be tolerating the bustle.” After a sip you asked, “You?”

“Oh, um, end of the week. Just a short stay out there. My part isn’t that long I believe.”

“Well if you need a place, tons of room.” His brow ticked up and you giggled, “It’s set up like a duplex, separate entrances, kitchens and all that.” Raising your cup again you added, “No pressure. Think it over, it’ll save some cash and carpooling if you don’t get sick of me.”

He chuckled again, “I doubt I could ever get sick of you.”

…

Sure enough by weeks end you were settled into the penthouse and by the growing wall of flashes word had spread of your tie to the film as well as the actor you had been spotted with each day after a pair of outings with Tom, spurring on a bout of rumors of a love triangle. The pair remained silent for the first two weeks until an off handed comment of, “Far more tempting fish in the ocean than me for those sweethearts.”

Tom fired first with a linked message to Richard on Twitter containing a picture of him with his arm around your back while you walked your dogs,  _“Pistols at dawn for the Lady’s hand.”_

A near inhuman squeal escaped into your pillow reading it only to almost pass out reading Richard’s response,  _“Agreed. Bring a witness, shovel and a very large box.”_  Linked to a picture of you with him as well snuggled around Gimli.

.

The morning of your first day you showed up early with Gimli at your side eagerly wagging his tail as you showed him into the room where you would be given your first scene. Most of the other actresses had already been through the table reads and you were filling in for another more well known actress who had been unable to be secured in time. On the side of the room you curled your legs up in your assigned chair, one awkwardly raised onto the arm with Gimli curled up in your lap. It must have been a sight with your focused furrowed gaze under your mess of curls flipped over to the right partially in your face flipping the page on the script raised off Gimli’s side in his wiggle to get a better look at the entering women stealing pictures of you.

Nearing you first Sandra grinned and extended her hand when she got close enough only to chuckle at the paw settling in it as you giggled and said, “This is Gimli.” She grinned at him and released his paw after a shake then accepted yours, “I’m Jaqi. Nice to meet you Sandra.”

She chuckled as you helped guide Gimli down then unfolded your legs to stand and greet the other women, mainly Helena who gasped and gave you a tight hug, “My dear sister!” you giggled as she pulled back and asked you with playfully narrowed eyes, “You are alright with the slap, correct?”

You nodded, “Yes. They made certain to ask me twice.”

She nodded, “Good.” Then leaned in to whisper with a grin, “Don’t worry, we do make up later on.” Winking at you before some of the other women came up to greet you and go through your first scene before the first take.

From day one after the awkward stance you had as strangers was passed the more each of them could see just how bubbly and fun you actually were to be around only adding to their wish to give your role a bit more depth and life. Even contrasting your own personality as standoffish and odd in a self protecting way to the point of lashing out at others harshly you were loved to be on screen with for their own characters to play off of. Through your silence the subtlety of your actions still played as great markers for your own place in those scenes others dominated in the front. And the first catty relationship with Helena’s Rose, your Ivy, had deepened into a timid trust after you had gone off to your own future when the joint venture of yours had first failed years ago. Only solidifying your friendship with her especially while you got to know one another deeper past your roles.

Off on a couple days a week you were tasked to arrive alone to a dance studio where you were rehearsing a previously deleted scene. A flash mob Ivy would create to distract a man holding possession of a magnetized watch they needed, this serving as your first scene with Richard when he finally arrived. An awkward first scene to have but still when the director looked into your history of dance training and a few roles based as a dancer her favored scene the former actress refused to do was back in. Sworn to secrecy you went home trying not to collapse before you got to bed after your crammed sessions of training in the three days before filming for the full five minute scene to Whitney Houston’s ‘I Wanna Dance With Somebody’.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pink's Blow Me One Last Kiss used for bonding scene

The distance between you in your time apart, even after such a short time knowing one another, Richard clung to your conversations with one another the more he got to know you and even grew to adore the playful protective back and forth with Tom online and in interviews they did about you continuing the teasing game no doubt making you blush deeper at it urging them to continue it. But today he would get to see you again. The whole flight overseas, even knowing he would be away from his mother for a couple months his pain lessened knowing he would be with you. Outside the airport you were parked in a rental widening his grin, he had in fact agreed to your offer of the spare apartment in the penthouse and was glad to be able to go shopping with you to fill his pantry. A planed joint dinner that night ended with a shared film with the credits signaling your parting until the ride in the following morning.

.

At your side Richard gained smirks at their recognizing him from the tug of war over you. While he got to know the women you were off to get changed into a leather jacket coated outfit over a tattered tank and jeans with sneakers under, a mask, hood and bright green wig topping it off. Curiously after his first scenes with the women yours began.

Claude was waiting in the park for Ivy to arrive, huffing and peering around between glances over at the man they were to be robbing out with his daughters. Out of nowhere music played stirring the faces of the random celebs and Claude to peer around until you would appear out of nowhere fully disguised starting to dance. Joined by dozens of dancers with a few stolen moments near the man and his daughters before heading back to the groups again.

The song came to a close and you rushed off, ducking behind a tree to remove your wig and mask before strolling back to his side seated on the fountain walking along the edge to crouch beside him saying, “You showed.”

His irritated scowl landing on your playful smirk as he shot to his feet triggering your rise up on the wall matching his height as he lowly growled at you, “Nine am! Where have you been?! We should have set a plan by now to get that-,”

In front of his face you dangled the watch and he claimed it as you giggled and turned to walk along the wall urging him after you, “How-?”

“You needed a distraction.” In a dig into your pocket you passed him, Richard’s own wallet, you had snuck out of his possession dropping the crew behind the camera’s mouths open at your studies into pick pocketing. In an unscripted lean in seeing the camera still rolling you playfully whispered, “If I really wanted to show you a trick I’d have pulled your boxers out of my pocket.”

He smirked at you asking lowly, “And if I said I don’t wear those?”

You grin leaning back barely an inch from his lips to whisper back, “I would hope you bathe, often.” Then giggle in your pull back strolling along as he pocketed his wallet and patted his other pockets curiously. “You owe me by the way.”

Smirking at your back he asked, “Oh, and what would that be?” Meeting your side in a few quickened steps.

“I’ll keep you posted.” You replied with a giggle.

.

Scene by scene you would linger on the side of the other’s until you shared another together. Seamlessly you flowed through the group scenes as written and yet in your scenes alone you were both to improvise when it came natural to you, hoping that you could add more for them to build on for the relationship between your characters to fit you in the joint last minute recasts. All the others being written out fully, while Claude would tease and try to trap Daphne (Anne’s role) he would genuinely, according to the director, have an attraction to Ivy.

Subtle teasing and jokes from the mainly silent Ivy away from the others and Richard’s grin seemed to settle into place between sets. More and more he found himself doubled over between takes as you giggled helplessly through your blushing over just what you had blurted out in response to his toying phrases.

All up to the day you would film the Met Gala entrance and post Gala scenes. The black gown with a fully sheer back save for a single black lined zipper hid an upper thigh length slit to further tease Claude with later. A full look freezing Richard in place for a few moments granting you time to inspect his sash coated suit before he turned to Anne’s side for their entrance together while you were filmed entering later.

The post scenes were after Daphne would strip Claude to the waist before handcuffing him to the bed helplessly. His struggle against the cuffs ended when he spotted you in the doorway sipping on a martini, “When I said you owed me this isn’t what I had in mind.”

Playfully his eyes narrowed at you and he fired back, “Find the key. Daphne left it, somewhere.”

His head turned in search of it only to halt as your fingers rose holding the key in them, “You mean this key? The one I saw her stash in a drawer in the kitchen on her way out?”

Off the doorframe you moved and strolled over to him as he asked, “Would you kindly unlock me?”

“So lucky I don’t enjoy cuffs.” You hummed unlocking the hand closest to you then handing the key over for him to unlock the other. The cuff opened and his head turned at the shift in the mattress and his eyes dropped to your exposed sheer thigh high and garter belt strap as you crossed your legs with a clearly teasing gaze. Before you could say a word your leg eased over more revealing the end of a tattooed leaf and in the darkening of his eyes at this alluring side he was seeing from you his eyes snapped to your withdrawing hand from your hip as the garter strap that snapped free flung back to thwack the back of your hand. A pained squeak left you and he smirked, reaching out to claim your injured hand that soon met his lips narrowing your gaze. “Careful there. Don’t make me cuff you again.”

His free fingers traced around your knee cap up your thigh leaning in to purr, “I am eternally in your debt.”

Barely above a whisper you replied, “Then I’ll need help with my zipper.” Signaling his lips to crash into yours with a content hum in the first kiss quickly followed by a second in his hand’s steady path to your zipper he slowly eased down. Cut was called and he carefully leaned over your shoulder to raise your zipper again in your mumbling into his shoulder, “Damn strap,” rubbing your hand he cupped and kissed again when he drew back.

Rolling your eyes you giggled at his deep chuckle, “The squeak was adorable though.”

“Don’t make me push you off the bed.” Making him laugh loudly at your next giggle.

.

That scene only the first, merely heated teasing and kissing with a few more to come. That night you laid out on your couch watching a film hearing your joining door easing open and a timid knock after. Blindly you asked, “What is it with people and their infinity pools? Freaking terrifying.”

A chuckle left Richard in his entering, “I got this wine-,” leaning over the back of the couch he showed you the label and you smirked.

“Fancy. Raised letters and all.” Making him chuckle, “Looks lovely. If you chose it no doubt it would be wonderful.”

Nodding along the way to your kitchen he found two glasses and opened the bottle, still smirking about your final scenes that day after the heated encounter in your casual clothes you were in the room chosen for Rose to fashion your gowns for the event.

.

Just moments (an hour in film time) prior Lou and Tammy had spotted your glaring at one another from across the apartment through the glass divider between rooms as you fixed yourself a bowl of mixed fruit you were peeling and slicing between design sketches you had made.

A single comment from Tammy stirred an old tradition unknowingly. “You two just need to bury the hatchet and get past this.” (Referring to the slapping scene where Rose slapped Ivy for seemingly abandoning her for her career as a model when their fashion line financially flopped.) Around the counter you set your bowl down catching Richard off set admiring your bare legs in your tiptoed stance to be in the frame  properly over the milky line on the divider. Your baggy hoodie hanging over your short shorts revealing a tattoo of a vine with a few icy leaves stemming from your left hip as you casually dug your phone from the pouch above your stomach, a few taps on the screen went unseen at the shifting of the wall of curls pooling into your face. Narrowing her gaze up at you Rose watched you walk in around the couch she was sketching on between glances at the fabric she had chosen earlier.

Instantly her lips had pursed as you set your phone on the dock in one of the cubbies across the wall that lit up. A low intro of a song began to play and instantly she cocked her head, “We are not children Ivy!”

You nodded and turned to her starting to sing along,

_White knuckles_

_And sweaty palms from hanging on too tight_

_Clenched shut jaw_

_I've got another headache again tonight_

_Eyes on fire, eyes on fire_

_And they burn from all the tears_

_I've been crying, I've been crying_

_I've been dying over you_

Setting her sketchpad down on the table she watched you bounce and sway to the music awkwardly as you had told the cast weeks prior your mother had used as a technique to keep you and your siblings to get along. Singing and dancing to the song of choice for one sibling until the other would join in easing the anger from your fights. A trick Helena instantly knew you needed to use to help meld the sisters together in a make up after the far more intense slap than previously assumed adding to the heated glares between you.

Rose, “I’m not doing this!”

You nodded and shrugged with your hands up and hair pooling into your face simply singing louder.

_Tie a knot in the rope_

_Trying to hold, trying to hold_

_But there's nothing to grab_

_So I let go_

Again at her arms crossing and failing battle at smirking while the women off screen watched your swaying and arm flailing dance around her with their mouths covered as Richard was near having to leave the room to keep from releasing his bubbling laughter.

_I think I've finally had enough_

_I think I maybe think too much_

_I think this might be it for us_

_Blow me one last kiss_

Rolling her eyes Rose sang along lowly and stirred into a forced set of taps on her feet closer to shifting her weight side to side than dancing. Turning to face her you pointed at her with both arms shifting back and forth in shoulder sways stirring out her smile more.

_You think I'm just too serious_

_I think you're full of shit_

_My head is spinning, so_

_Blow me one last kiss_

Louder and louder she sang and in the next set of verses you were leaning towards and away from the other in a matched shimmy sending your curls flying about your faces while her loose bun eased free. Bouncing from foot to foot along to the beat.

_Just when it can't get worse_

_I've had a shit day_

_You've had a shit day_

_We've had a shit day_

Together as the music grew louder at the tap of Rose’s finger in her passing the dock she joined you closer to the couch with arms raising over her head matching yours showing a flash of a rose tattoo on her side similar to yours but upside down with blooming roses on the swirled stem. Her hips bopping side to side matching yours in similar awkward hopping turns.

_I think that life's too short for this_

_Want back my ignorance and bliss_

_I think I've had enough of this_

_Blow me one last kiss_

The pace slowed a bit and you both neared the couch.

_I won't miss all of the fighting_

_That we always did_

_Take it in_

_I mean what I say when I say "there is nothing left"_

 

_No more sick whiskey dick_

_No more battles from me_

_You'll be calling a trick_

_'Cause you no longer sleep_

Each sway of your hips giving a glimpse of both a set of petals matching Rose’s tattoo implying the same tattoo on you both between flashes of the white jagged scars over your opposite hip from your accident when you were little. All while you both sang louder to the verses between random swings and flips of your hair.

_I'll dress nice, I'll look good_

_I'll go dancing alone_

_I will laugh, I'll get drunk_

_I'll take somebody home_

_I think I've finally had enough_

_I think I maybe think too much_

_I think this might be it for us_

_Blow me one last kiss_

_You think I'm just too serious_

_I think you're full of shit_

_My head is spinning, so_

_Blow me one last kiss_

_Just when it can't get worse_

_I've had a shit day_

_You've had a shit day_

_We've had a shit day_

_I think that life's too short for this_

_Want back my ignorance and bliss_

_I think I've had enough of this_

At the same time while the others strolled in through the doorway opposite you you both hopped onto the couch singing louder leaning in swaying your shoulders again while the women stared at you in their best stunned expressions. Each verse you kept growing louder and dancing even weirder while Lou mumbled, “You’re the one who said to bury the hatchet.” Strolling through the apartment into another room with the others following after.

_Blow me one last kiss_

_Blow me one last kiss_

_Blow me one last kiss_

_I will do what I please_

_Anything that I want_

_I will breathe, I will breathe_

_I won't worry at all_

_You will pay for your sins_

_You'll be sorry, my dear_

_All the lies, all the whys_

_Will all be crystal clear_

_I think I've finally had enough_

_I think I maybe think too much_

_I think this might be it for us_

_Blow me one last kiss_

Six verses later and the song ended leaving you both giggling and shoving your curls out of your faces sprawled out on opposite ends of the three seating couch for this planned to be improvised scene when they couldn’t write a satisfying enough version. In a shaking of her head Rose stated tearfully, “I’m still furious with you.” She paused then added, “How could you just leave me like that?”

Splitting the air in the set the fun air dropped at your tear filled eyes locking on hers with trembling response, “You really think I wanted to? That contract was supposed,” Even Helena’s breath hitched at your crack in your voice, “To save us.” Heavily Richard’s heart dropped seeing a tear run down your cheek, “Instead it was five years in Paris with me unable to so much as choose my own coat to check the mail without consulting for allowed brands or for someone to capture the three second trip on film or Paul would be ruthless until the contract ran out.” Inching closer to you Helena’s hands settled on your thighs as you neared your emotional limit revealed by your pinking cheeks and squeaked out, “You’re all I have.”

Tearfully she replied, “I didn’t know.” Sniffling in your lean in to rest your foreheads on one another shoulders you both sniffled again as your tears fell onto your mingled legs until cut was called. Seeing your trembling hands  rising to wipe your cheeks the director refused to try for another go, but surprisingly as you peered up at Helena you couldn’t help but giggle awkwardly and mumble out of your accent matching hers, “I’m probably all blotchy and snot bubbles over here. Still a bit weak on control in crying scenes.”

She shook her head saying as the girls came back in to pool around you, “Not at all dear. Bit pink, but you’ve certainly got the heartbreak eyes down.” A giggle left her at Gimli’s bounding path over to wiggle onto your laps trying to lighten your mood also easing Richard’s in the distance.

A couple more interaction scenes for the group were shot with you off to the side quietly as usual with only a few add ins when Claude would stroll through. First just inspecting you all until his eyes settled on you and he made his first circle of you with a spreading smirk as he gave his measurements to Rose. His assumed inseam measurement in his turn away from you had you look away from your sketch to blatantly stare at his ass with your head tilted. The feeling of eyes on him made him turn in time to catch you say to Rose across from you, “Wishful thinking. Add a couple inches.”

His brow rose and you smirked at him, “We don’t want people assuming you’re wearing a diaper, do we now?” making his eyes narrow playfully in his move back to your counter as you grabbed a slice of melon to snack on.

In a purr he leaned in stirring curious smirks and glances between the other women, “And what would you, assume, I would be wearing?”

Leaning in you blindly grabbed a slice of an orange you moved to offer to him slowly as you stated, “Obviously, something big enough to fit around that ego of yours.” Twitching up your brow playfully as his parted lips freed a gasp at your popping the fruit between your lips in your turn to hop off your stool to take your sketches to Rose, who was eyeing him protectively with a brow raised over her lowered glasses on the tip of her nose she pushed up to look over your first sketch.

.

The second glass was eased into your palm as he settled down under your legs he shifted to lay across his lap sipping on his glass while eyeing the lavish house used in the slasher flick on the screen. “Why are you watching this if you hate the house?”

Pointing at the screen you said, “On the right.”

His brow rise curiously only to drop as he chuckled in shock seeing you racing through the background escaping from the man with a crossbow trying to kill one of the birds he was hallucinating after breaking a seal on a cursed item. “You asked about first roles on set the other day. It happened to be on. Just a few seconds. But the director’s next film I got a staggering two lines.” Making him chuckle as you giggled at the reason why, your hip deep fall into a deep puddle you had underestimated.

“That must have hurt.”

“So bad. Dislocated my hip. My brother was there, had to help me pop it back in for the next take once I was dried off.” He chuckled again and you added, “Ten more takes until the ‘star’ felt good about his take and they still went with this one because I just giggled it off. Called me the glimmer of hope to his long shoot. It was one of the last scenes shot.”

“No wonder. Bet you drew some attention.”

You giggled, “Oh yes, kids were relentless, ‘Puddle Girl’ each time they saw me for a couple years till the next big slasher came out.”

More and more as you shared stories about your random bit roles spilling into how you got to your former show his endearing gaze deepened and he kept thinking back to how he only had just under a couple more weeks with you. Already his chest hurt knowing he couldn’t be able to unwind with you each night and more and more it started to weigh heavier on him, the secret between you.

Out of nowhere the words just slipped out when you asked him what his parents thought of his aspirations growing up. “I don’t want to talk about my family right now.” Tears came out of nowhere and you scooted closer to him leaving your wine aside easing your arm around his shoulders as he held in the whole discovery tale up to how the other day again she had been trying to hold off the conversation of a hospice from her doctors in her refusal to accept she was near the end of her battle just yet. Lower and lower he sank until he was latched around your chest holding you tightly in silent tears at your fingers easing through his hair.

In a near broken tone he whispered, “I am sorry.”

You shook your head smoothing one of your hands over his back as the other smoothed through his hair again, “Don’t apologize.” your words died at his tightening around you, and you folded around him more, “I’m here if you need me.”

Not long after he rumbled, “I should try to sleep.” Straightening up as you sat up behind him smoothing his hair into place again.

Another quick stolen hug later he gratefully melted into had you saying, “You’re welcome to climb into mine later if you can’t sleep.”

Forcing out a chuckle he climbed to his feet stealing a peck on your cheek he kept at that against his growing urge to simply kiss you outright before he made his way back to his apartment to change for bed. But surely enough as you laid out on your bed under the covers trying to keep from wondering what had caused his tears the light from the hall fell dim for a moment at the body passing through it casting a shadow over you. A few moments later he was in your room beside your bed easing into it behind you to melt around your back humming out in a vulnerable tone, “You’re certain I can stay here?”

Nodding you hummed back, “Anytime.” Folding your hand around his wrists to tighten his grip around you easing his melt against you.

Morning found you still nestled together and reluctantly after two snoozes on your alarm you both climbed out of bed to face the day. Just under two weeks was all you had left and in the middle of this next set of scenes more teasing banter was traded before another slinking path was taken through the apartment for Claude to halt with his arm extended around your side to plant on the wall of cubbies in your search for a book he had asked for. Though in his lean in to kiss your cheek a deep chuckle left him at your easing the book between your faces in time to send a playful glance his way over the book through his playful glare.

That single teasing glace was the first trickle of an avalanche for him, the struggle to remain at a distance from you continued to grow stronger only aiding to a slip of the tongue. His daydream of who he could be to you led to a slip of a coveted title for you in a call home again checking in on his mother, one that led to a moment of excitement from her. The giddy tone in his voice was enough to keep the fib going until he could at least offer you a request to go on a date with him. An offer was made for dinner, one that was overheard and stolen for a group dinner by the others so off home you went to primp and change for the group meal. Through the sea of flashes you entered the building and eased into the seat beside Richard’s in the back room you were granted and the more boisterous the women around you grew at the flowing of wine you were eased more against his chair eventually freeing his fingers to brush along the top of your knee absently.

By the bill being paid his hand had rested plainly across your lower thigh just above your knee marking gentle circles into your skin only adding to the effect of the adoring gaze he was giving you that had gone unnoticed by you until you moved to stand. A short drive later and the left over portion of your shared dessert was set out able to be finished while Richard set out another helping of his wine he had bought for the both of you the day prior. Bottle drained and glasses put away another steady path after you found Richard once again planted behind you, without a camera crew or a script to guide you along it was mainly feeling and your shared attraction muddling your pain.

Firmly his lips found yours, smoothly your fingers trailed through his hair while his eased over your sides and down your hips. Not long after a lower grip was taken and your legs were wrapped around his waist to carry you into your bedroom. Beneath him and arching into his touch slipping lower down your navel you bit at your lip while his lips and stubble scraped along your neck until his low grumble sounded against your skin when your own hand sank to cup him. Against your skin he murmured at your unhooking his belt. “I, um. I forgot to shop.”

Weakly you chuckled, “If you mean condoms, I have some.” At his playful smirk at you your eyes rolled and hand moved stirring a deep moan from him at the firm stroke you eased along his shaft, playfully asking, “A girl can dream, can’t she?”

Chuckling lowly he purred back, “So you have been dreaming of me?” shaking his head for a moment easing his hand into your hair to kiss your neck again, “I’ve had a quite a few of you.” Firmer his lips met your neck urging you to bite your lip in his silent melting around you in his returned fervor to his former plans.

Sunrise came with a deep inhale from you met with a stroke of a nose against yours stirring your eyes open for a moment. Anxiously the pair of blue eyes scanned over your face for a discerning clue as to what you thought of your night together fully sober out of the wine colored haze. Softly at his lips parting you uttered, “Shh.” Seeing the question in his eyes before yours drooped shut in closing the distance between you, fingers easing through his hair your lips worked against his stirring a pleased hum from him as you rolled him onto his back.

Another packet was torn open and when the latex was added through your deepening lip lock you eased around him again earning a deep moan dying against your lips. Rocking above him his hands cupped and stroked at their pleasure hoping to egg you along until his stubble met your neck again stirring a whispered curse from you at the peak he was drawing you to. Closer and closer he drew you stealing what time you had until work to deepen this bond with you, moments he etched into his memory for when he would have to be torn from you again for another job far away.

All while your eyes remained fixed shut between stolen glimpses at him in your mental war with yourself. Clearly this wouldn’t last, clearly you wouldn’t be enough. It was stated plainly, he wanted children, something you couldn’t give him, but for every second he was willing to share with you each morsel of his granted affection and attention would be savored and cherished until the inevitable split. It was doomed but you weren’t fool enough to turn away what time you had to share with this incredible man. Damn the pain you knew was looming ahead, for now he was yours and all too willing to be so.

.

Ten days seemed to fly by and your last together went sleeplessly. With a final eventually deleted scene of Ivy rescuing Claude from imprisonment, outside the prison a simple walk to her waiting car he turns and pins her against claiming a fiery kiss from her. Neither of you brought up titles, simply held onto what you had and silently hoped the other would remain true in the other’s absence. “Fuck, it tore.” Panting and seated between your trembling legs those same helplessly dazzling blue eyes on him scanned over you for a reaction only to find you panting with hands shifting in a near lifeless wave from your stomach.

Wetting his lips he moved to sit beside you easing the torn latex he tossed into the trash pail with the others and looked you over again uncertain of what to say. Whoops didn’t quite cover it, but then again you were absolutely the woman he ached to possibly have a family with. Yes you had said it was unlikely to happen naturally, but you did mention once an offer from your identical cousin, daughter to your mother’s twin sister, to act as surrogate for you if you ever wished at her seemingly over eager womb and seven children proving successful at the task. There was a chance of a family with you, even if all you had was adopting, he knew you were it, he just had to get you both in the same place again soon for an offered date. You clearly felt something for him, seemed to have a hopeful glint in your eyes towards him he was certain he held towards you, yes your ex was an ass but this would be different. Richard was different and he hoped you would know that by now and grant him a chance.

Rolling onto your side your arm rested over his curled leg with a shrug and a sighed response, “Either way I’m on the pill.”

Wetting his lips again he eased down to lay next to you tangling his leg between yours curling you against his chest murmuring against the top of your head, “I don’t want to leave you.”

Softly you giggled saying after a peck on his chest, “Work is inevitable. Just a couple more months till I’m back in England.”

He grumbled, “And probably weeks longer till I’m back.”

“Oh you’ll be fine.” Again he grumbled at the alarm sounding for him to ready for his ride to the airport. With a giggle you rolled him over guiding him off the bed towards your bathroom, “I’ll start your shower.”

Nipping at his lip he followed you feeling himself already growing hard again at the thought of another round in a steamy shower. A near puppy dog pouting glance had you giggling and joining him inside where sure enough a kiss on your neck spurred on another knee weakening kiss ending with you planted against the wall. Lost in the flurry of it all again he filled you again and clung to you in the frenzied quickie ending in a hurried pace to dry, dress and finish packing. One last time he walked you down to climb into separate cars for the painful parting. Biting your lip you focused on the drive ahead and lines you had to try and improvise for the scenes today you hoped could distract you from the first of your nights alone again.


	3. Chapter 3

Two months seemed to stagger by and the women seemed not to notice your struggles with everything going on which only seemed to make you more restless and increase your seeming growing sluggishness and urge to curl up and sleep after shifts. Inhaling deeply you sat on the plane back home stroking your brows with a finger at the shifting in your stomach. Finally the belt symbol went off and you found your feet to exit your empty row on the half empty red eye flight to walk to the bathroom. Swallowing dryly your hand planted on the wall by the door as the room seemed to shift drawing a stewardess over to you with a sympathetic grin and pat on your shoulder, “Do you need anything?”

Inhaling deeply again you replied shakily, “I, um, just a bit nauseous, and the plane is spinning.”

She nodded and guided you inside the lavatory where she wet a rag she passed to you, “Here, I’ll get you a ginger ale.” Her grin grew as you nodded and dabbed the cloth over your forehead and the back of your neck breathing deeply until she came back and softly added, “You know, I used to fly fine, then all of a sudden out of the blue I was a miserable passenger.” She said passing you a slice of lemon, “Just in case you are, try this, helped me with my morning sickness.”

Before you could argue you thought back to the barely there spotting on your former sugar pill weeks you didn’t pay any mind to as it had happened before in strenuous work schedules. A few minutes later her trick seemed to work and you thanked her and made your way back to your seat with that send off morning lingering in your mind.

Peering out your window you propped your feet in your seat resting your knuckles against your lips trying to remain calm as to what this could possibly mean. One, you could be pregnant, but after that you would have to inform the man you had conceived with of this supposed impossible event. Two weeks, you had barely been intimate two weeks, had deliberately pushed aside conversations of being something more and now you were facing possible parenthood together.

.

Firmly on the ground you found your way to claim your luggage and Gimli before finding a taxi to head to your cottage. Barely a few minutes there you fed Gimli and then turned to change your shirt, over the wifi you emailed your gynecologist you had found when you first moved in for an appointment to possibly confirm your suspicion. A short drive later you were parked outside and made the walk inside pausing only to avoid the stunned gasps of the women and teens recognizing you along the way. An eager grin spread across the face of the woman behind the counter who eased her seat closer to her computer, “Miss Pear?”

You nodded, “Yes.”

She chuckled, “I will let her know you are here. We had a cancellation so you should get in a bit earlier.”

You nodded, “thank you.” Then you turned to eye the waiting room to choose your seat, wetting your lips you settled into your chosen chair peering up at the peppy pair of women bantering on the talk show playing softly trying to ignore the pair of teens by their mother on the row of chairs behind you whispering about you.

The door parted and a much needed, “Miss Pear?” was called out and you stood brushing your shirt down hiding the flash of your lingering fake tattoo under the hem. Behind her the path to your assigned room was short and she closed the door behind you saying, “So, if you will strip into this gown the Doctor will be in with you shortly.” You nodded accepting the gown as she slipped out of the room with a grin as yours dropped.

Once again you were seated in a gown with your ankles crossed and swinging steadily in an attempt to calm yourself until the grinning blonde walked in with tablet resting on her arm. She closed the door behind her and gave you a wider grin in offering her hand, “I’m Samantha, pleasure to meet you Miss Pear. What brings you in today? I see you’ve had an ovary removed, any issues pertaining that?”

“Um,” you wet your lips, “I, well sort of. I was told it was unlikely I could get pregnant.”

Her brows crunched up and her head tilted in a quick shake, “Not true, at all. At least from your notes in your file. It would be difficult, yes, but not impossible. You believe you might be pregnant?”

“I’m on the pill, but there was a broken condom and a forgotten one after that. Honestly,” she gave you a comforting nod sitting on her stool she wheeled closer to you, “I’ve felt a bit sluggish, but until I got on the plane to fly back out here I never had any sickness or anything like that, and I fly often, it was a smooth flight, just wings up and I was spinning.”

She gave you a comforting smile, “Well, first off, if you could give me a urine sample, we can do the traditional stick test while I get the ultrasound equipment wheeled in here.” You nodded and accepted the cup she found for you in the cabinet and let you step into the attached bathroom as she stepped out. When you came out again the cart was set up and you climbed back onto the table as she opened the packet for the over the counter test chuckling, “Most times these are really effective and saves a blood test.”

A heart stopping positive result had you laying back for a simple exam before she smoothed a bit of gel on the wand she eased across your stomach. Tearfully you stared at the screen with a pair of pulsing bubbles on it, “Oh wow.”

She let out a cheery giggle, “It seems your ovary had other plans than listening to those other Doctors.” Her grin widened printing you a copy of the images after taking a few measurements, “By my best guess-,”

“Eight and a half weeks?”

With a confirming nod she said after wetting her lips, “Looks about right, they do seem healthy, nothing seems amiss.” She turned to face you turning off the machine wiping off your middle before helping you upright again, “I will say, I have seen women with a single ovary before miscarry before their second trimester on rare occasion. It doesn’t seem like you will have that issue, just be sure to avoid anything too strenuous. I have seen your former show, I am not certain what you are working on now but taking it easy, getting plenty to eat and rest will help. You’ll be needing it with twins especially.”

.

Fully dressed again you made your way out of the building back to your car you settled inside. As if in a trance you made your way back home and settled into your couch where you stared at your phone until you finally raised it to your ear with the producer on the line. A short mention later were pleasantly surprised at the thrilled producer who had been trying to ask you about your thoughts on deepening your on screen relationship with ‘Eric’ while rumors were swirling about you and Richard still.

Without bothering to ask about any relationship status or anything past the physical limitations for your safety and that of your baby the call ended with them stating they would talk to the writers about where Sophie and Eric would go next. Blankly you stared at your phone after typing the same message to your father and older brothers for a good time to talk until Gimli approached you with a whine and leash between his teeth for a walk you were glad to take to get yourself a hopefully calming breath of fresh air.

All night you waited, knowing Richard was on a train for work leaving him unable to be told about this, even if you had wanted to tell him over the phone. Alone in the park you mumbled to yourself in your head, _Hey Rich, no, me? I’m fine. A bit pregnant…_ Shaking your head with a sigh you eyed the tree lined path ahead subtly smoothing your fingers along your stomach to brush your bunching up shirt down. _No, can’t do it over the phone. How fucked up would that be? Barely two weeks together and now just bam, baby_ … After a sigh you continued, _I told him I can’t. Fuck, he’s probably gonna think I was lying. Fuck. How the fuck am I going to tell him?_

Instantly your stomach clenched with nerves knowing how most men usually act around hearing their fling chick gets knocked up, but he couldn’t be like that. Instantly your nausea turned to fighting off tears as those years of being told you couldn’t conceive came flooding back. This could still be your only chance, surely he would understand there was no fighting this. Even in the far off unlikelihood of his refusing to be in their lives you would still have them and raise them as best you could alone always hoping he would change his mind.

Staring ahead you kept yourself from crying and maintained a seemingly normal expression you hoped on the walk home again. Giddily Gimli made his way to his water bowl as you turned to make a stop to the market, with a cart in front of you through the basic soap section you walked finding a few random items. Along with a bottle of b12, a skin and hair vitamin conveniently beside the prenatal vitamins along with a new pack of liners on the way to head to the dog food leaving your food for last. A full basket later you went to the self check section and rang it all up and pushed it back to the car outside. The bottle hadn’t gone unnoticed but a woman passing by stated proudly to her daughter, “See, I told you the vitamins help with your hair. Look at hers, so thick and bouncy. After trying those my hair bounced back after my wild pink phase.”

Everything was put away and you drew out your phone with a hopeful grin only to see the alert on your phone reminding you of your nail appointment the following morning. Sighing deeply you remembered your chosen design for the next section of the season and turned to start dinner after feeding Gimli, whose overly protective streak and snuggling on your lap made more sense now.

Over your bowl of filling pasta with extra meat sauce and cheese grated on top while researching online, typical books were added to your shopping list to be shipped to your cottage so you wouldn’t cause a flurry of headlines in shopping for them publicly. By the time you had gone to bed you had delved into all you could learn online and stared at the wall wiping your cheeks after snuggling with your pillow tighter mumbling, “Maybe I’ll have a little Thorin after all.” Hoping that at least your family might message you in the morning.

.

Morning rolled around and after an early breakfast you went off to the salon you had a reservation in. Parked in your space you walked the short distance inside you already felt attention on you in your path to the front counter and gave your name. Across the room you were led to a wall of choices for nail polish, among your character’s traits you had unknowingly added to your Sophie. At the selection of colors and stickers the artist showed you the fox stickers for the simple design over the white tips you were replacing on your trimmed nails along with a matte glittery grey for your toenails to pair with a set of orange geometric fox heads for your big toes.

First you were shown over to the table where your finger nails were swapped out and coated with a clear coat over the fox stickers in various stages of play and relaxing along with a clear stone added to each pinky the foxes were peering up at ready to pounce on them. The walk over to the pedicure station brought the pair of ladies and an oddly familiar looking chestnut haired man with painfully blue eyes to your attention all at manicure stations of their own whispering about you. A tilt of your feet had the moccasins off your feet and you rolled up your pant legs awkwardly settling your hands on your thighs to keep from smoothing your palms over your stomach. Nipping at your lip you turned your head to the strawberry blonde settling into the seat beside you with the tall elderly woman being helped into the seat on your left.

Once settled in she turned to you with a grin stirring up your grin asking, “I take it Rich didn’t show you our pictures then?”

A soft gasp left you and at the gentle hands on your feet you eased them into the warm water, “You’re Rich’s Mum?”

Your eyes turned to the man who offered his freshly manicured hand that yours eased into for a gentle shake, “Chris.”

You let out a weak giggle realizing the resemblance to his younger brother as you turned back to the blonde offering her hand, “Tammy.” Now registering in your mind as his wife, fabled mother to his young nephew Trevor.

Chris took his seat and you turned back to Margaret and you said with a giggle, “No, Rich didn’t show me your pictures. He seemed to take being away hard.”

She nodded and then eased her feet into the water saying, “We’re off to eat after back home, care to join us?”

A grin eased across your lips mirroring her hopeful one and you nodded, “Sure, if you don’t mind.” With a pause you added, “Oh, I’ll have to walk my dog first, though,” you wet your lips and hastily added, “I’m not trying to get out of it-,”

She shook her head and let out a weak chuckle, “You know what, a nice walk sounds lovely before tea. You can bring Gimli along after if you like, Rich told us all about him, we’ve been quit eager to meet him, and you.” She chuckled again, “Sent us all so many pictures of you and your little family.”

At once it clicked in your head that while Tammy on your right shared a few pictures of Trevor keeping the topic of your relationship private until you left the shop. Out in the street Chris grinned at you smoothing his pant leg down again still grinning at Tammy’s giggle seeing he stuck true to the bright green color he chose for his toes and said, “We’ll follow after you.”

You nodded and climbed into your car starting the short drive ending with their parking beside you and climbing out inspecting your cottage. A turn of a key later you opened the door claiming the leash hanging there and called out, “Gimli.”

Paws scampered across the floor from his place sprawled out in the sun from your back windows on his favorite chair. Curiously when he reached you his head tilted peering over the trio as you hooked his leash before he neared them with a pleased wag of his tail through Chris asking, “You sure you’re up for a walk Mum?”

Her hand patted on his chest, “I am fine. I can still beat you around any trail young man. You just remember that.” Spurring a weak grin onto his face.

Nearing them you said, “We usually take the shorter route anyways, looks like it might rain later anyways, Gimli hates mud stuck in his fur. Shouldn’t take more than ten minutes.”

Margaret’s arm looped through yours and she started you back to the street from your driveway, “Don’t you worry about that. Now, tell me all about this new show of yours.”

An easy grin smoothed across your face and you shared it all with her catching subtle glances from the others aimed at Margaret, who seemed to hold her grin focusing on you until Gimli paused to bark at a buzzing bug flying too close to you he bopped away with his paw stirring the attention of a few dogs continuing trotting along their merry ways. When you reached the end of the trail Chris’ eyes settled on the bench a few feet off and he settled his hand on his mother’s shoulder saying, “I’ll fetch the car. Take a seat.”

Margaret rolled her eyes and Tammy eased her arm around her shoulders saying, “You know he is better, made it nearly the full way back this time.”

Margaret nodded then glanced at you catching your puzzled expression between them you quickly forced a grin to cover it, at once her brows twitched together and she asked, “He hasn’t told you?”

A curious grin twitched onto your face and you asked, “Told me what?”

Tammy’s mouth fell open and she muttered, “You’ve been together for months! How can he not tell you?!”

On your right your head turned to find Chris grinning in the car he parked along the curb, Margaret patted your shoulder saying, “Let’s get you to our home and you can meet John, he’ll fix us up some tea and I’ll tell you all about it.” You nodded and led Gimli into the back seat beside Tammy as Margaret took the front seat.

.

“Rich didn’t tell her.” The statement was echoed around the quaint cottage Gimli was inspecting with a wagging tail as you settled into the couch beside Margaret who settled her hands around one of yours to say, “I think it’s best to spill it all right away. The reason Rich took being away so hard is because I have cancer. It was a bit after my first round he left.” The internal gears clicked into place and you knew why his moods felt so familiar. She gave a brief recap on what he hadn’t been able to share, “That’s why Chris is so protective, and why Rich most likely didn’t want to admit it.”

You nodded and said, “I get why Ben was so determined to get us to meet up.”

Margaret nodded and patted your hands with a borderline teary gaze, “I am sorry to hear about your brothers, and what happened after, with your ex and to your family.” Her grin widened though as she continued, “But we are so glad to hear you and Rich are so happy together. He really needs it. Someone able to tear him out of his moods. Someone he can be honest with and share his worries and passions and,” her voice paused at the tear streaming down your cheek, “Dear, what did I say?”

You shook your head and Gimli came bounding into the room instantly trying to wiggle against you with a pleading whine to stop crying as John walked through with a tray of tea and a drooping grin while Chris held a tin of biscuits and Tammy peered between the two seeing what had stopped them.

Chris, “Mum, you told her already?”

Margaret nodded and peered at the trio saying, “Yes, but we were just talking about Rich,” she looked at you again catching your head shaking and hand rising to wipe your cheeks through a sniffle.

“No, sorry, it,” you let out a defeated chuckle and you squeaked out in a shrug at her unable to hold it in anymore, “I’m pregnant.” Their mouths fell open and they all moved closer as more tears eased over your cheeks while you rambled out, “I’ve heard since I was little I couldn’t, and Rich doesn’t know, and I won’t see him for months possibly and it doesn’t seem right to tell him over the phone. I really shouldn’t be saying it to anyone, but-,” your voice broke off in a squeak and John knelt at your feet resting his hands on your lap.

His eyes shining up at you worried, “Why do you think you shouldn’t say anything?”

Inhaling unsteadily again you replied as steadily as you could while wiping your blotchy cheeks again, “Because women with one ovary can still lose the pregnancy early on. They’re healthy now, but-,”

Tammy, “They?”

You nodded and dug into your pocket pulling out the sonogram copies stirring a tearful smile onto Margaret and John’s faces as Chris said, “Twins.”

Wetting your lips again you said, “Found out yesterday.”

Tammy, “How far in?”

“Two and a half months.”

Margaret eased closer to you, “You’re pregnant.” Easing you into a tight hug you melted into before pulling back to catch your eyes again with another tearful smile seeming ten years younger at the news, “Thank you for telling us. No matter when you decide to tell Rich we won’t say a word till then. I take it you haven’t told anyone else?”

“I had to call work. Some limits to add, to keep it as easy going as possible away from the take downs and tussles they had for Sophie last season. Mentioned something about writing it in possibly. I’ll be showing before long-,”

Before you could add to the sentence her hands patted yours again, “You are going to have two healthy babies, I just know it. And Rich will love to hear it. He’s been wanting to settle down for so long now.” She patted them again seeing the doubt in your eyes, “Trust me, he will be thrilled, nine or nineteen weeks in.”

John grinned moving to pour you some tea after patting your knee again, “He will. And if you called him about it he’d come racing home no matter what he had to break off to do so.” He eyed Gimli nuzzling his nose to your belly, “No doubt Gimli’s pleased to hear about the babies.”

You giggled softly, “He certainly caught on before I did. Never thought to share though, just let me get on the plane and have the world turn upside down on me.”

Tammy let out a knowing huff, “With Trevor, had to fly for a conference, I just about lived in that plane lavatory.”

“The stewardess gave me a lemon slice, helped a bit.” After a brief sharing about their shared early months the family albums were broken out along with home videos as you all snuggled together until Tammy and Chris had to go pick Trevor up from school signaling John to volunteer to drive you home again at the late hour.

On her feet by the door Margaret wrapped you in a tight hug again repeating, “Thank you for telling us. We will see you Wednesday and whenever you want to chat just give us a ring or drop by.” Her hand settle don your cheek, “You’re family my dear. Any time at all.” She turned heading to bed at John’s stating he set up her snuggling spot up for her with a fresh cup of tea and her favorite show ready to play on his guiding you to the door with keys in hand as Gimli trotted along with you holding his own leash.

.

Each day you seemed to grow closer to the brood between messages and calls from Richard varying from innocent check ins to the quickly heating up trading of fantasies in your late night calls after his long shifts. Each day you both shared what your characters got up to, his Daniel out in Berlin up against your Sophie, whom he heard talk of a deepening on the romance with Eric, with jealousy evident in his voice each night. Always followed by concern as he felt a looming mocked pregnancy on the way, hoping you would be able to handle that well with your own concerns on conceiving, each time mentally looping him back to having a family with you. Tonight though he finally had the courage to ask you after weeks of bolstering up his own courage.

“I, um, I’m flying back in a couple days. I was hoping we might be able to catch a bite?”

A chuckle left you and you teased back, “After nearly seven months together you really have to ask if I’ll have a meal with you?”

An understanding gasp left him and he asked, “They told you? When did they tell you?”

“What?” you giggled, “The fact that a week into filming you told them we were an item?”

“Jaqi-,”

“Oh no, no escaping it. You should have seen the grin on your Mum’s face when they found me in that salon.”

He chuckled replying in a low sheepish tone, “She did mention your day of breaking out the albums. Thank you, for not outing me.”

You giggled again, “You know you could have told me about the flub sooner.”

“I know.” He wet his lips, “Is that a yes?” he asked hopefully, “To our being an item? I know you went through hell with your ex,”

“You’re not him Rich. And yes, we can catch a bite when you get home.” Widening his grin, “Now get back to set I can hear them calling you, I have to get back and have my ear nibbled.” A low growl sounded through the phone making you giggle saying, “No worries, just a fantasy, ends up being Gimli.” Making him chuckle and traded promises to talk later, struggling to keep his mind off you in anyone’s arms but his. Turning to focus on his pleasure at knowing you had agreed to give him a chance.

..

Four months in and finally Richard was home, all week he had to sit through reports on social media about some small baby bump you were seen sporting around set the cast had all said was too uncomfortable to be put on and taken off between takes. Finally he could take you on that date he had settled with you, but not after stopping in to see his family first. While you were off on set he would spend the full day with his mother finding out the news about her latest check up and when she would begin her next round of chemo.

All day you managed to get through and convincingly mislead yet another fan that snuck on set that your bump was just for the show in the few minutes it took for security to rush in and guide her back out again peacefully. A deep sigh left you as you pulled into your drive after the long day, stretching your back in your seat you noticed Richard’s car at the end of it and him standing against it. With lips parted you climbed out of the now parked car seeing him straighten up and wipe his cheeks. Just looking him over when Gimli hopped out your door to race to the house you nodded your head, “Come on in.”

Wetting his lips he nodded and followed you to the door and inside, leaving his boots and jacket by the door where you left your sneakers. Barely a step into the sitting room you turned to ask him if he wanted to have some tea only to be wrapped tightly in his arms. In his grip you guided him towards the couch asking, “What’s wrong Richard?”

Harder and harder he sobbed while you stroked his back and combed your fingers through his hair pressing kisses to his temple in his settling against your chest until he finally calmed. Against your chest in a weak trembling voice he admitted, “My Mum has cancer.” Your silence made him ask, “They told you?”

“I understand why you didn’t. I really do.”

“Of course they had to tell you. I mean you’ve been around for, what three of her appointments.” He wet his lips asking, “They told you the odds then? About another round of chemo?”

“Yes.” You replied tearfully. “At our last dinner, even talked about possible nurses for hospice-,” his head nuzzled closer to your chest and your arms tightened around his back only for his eyes to open at the shifting he felt under his chest making your lips part at the timing. A following shift drew his hand to settle on top of your stomach making him inch up peering at the bump his hand circled under your shirt feeling your actual rounding belly before his eyes met your teary gaze.

“I, um,” you swallowed dryly with a tear rolling down your cheek, “I didn’t want to say anything until you got back. My Doctor said there were risks-,” Settling his legs curled around you with yours resting over them so he could be closer to you his eyes locked on yours with his hands remaining on your belly, “There was still a chance I could miscarry early on and we weren’t, official, and I wasn’t certain how you would react. I hoped you would be alright with this. It might be my only chance.” One of his hands rose to wipe away your next tear, “I mean I made it seem like it was hopeless and then I’m just-,”

He shook his head and closed the distance silencing your doubtful explanation with a firm kiss ending with his forehead pressed to yours through a relieved chuckle, “We’re having a baby!”

Shaking your head you drew the picture from your pocket you passed to him drawing his eyes to it with a confused furrow of his brows until he spotted the pair of tiny bodies, “Twins?” His eyes met yours and you gave him a weak smile instantly spreading his lighting up his face to playfully say, “That’s one determined ovary.” Making you giggle and roll your eyes. Again his eyes filed with tears and he pulled out his phone asking, “I have to call my Mum. You mind?”

You shook your head and went to the kitchen, “I’ll put on the kettle.”

Filling the kettle with water you heard Richard sniffle and cheerfully say, “Mum. I know I just left, but I have some great news,” grinning to yourself you set out the mugs hearing his playful, “She did now?” You could just about feel his smirk aimed at the kitchen as he listened to all the ideas she had on him moving out of his flat into your cottage near theirs so you wouldn’t have to move the nursery you had already started to pull together she pled with him to try and purchase for you both after the difficulty the owners were trying to give you in just the month to month set up. At the very least she asked if he could see if there were others nearby for sale he could look into, possibly a bit bigger for the twins to have room to grow and play while Gimli could still be near the park for daily walks. The call ended and he hung up assuring her of his love and that he would do the best he could.

Leaning in the doorway against the frame he smirked at you, “You have been keeping some secrets of your own.” As you moved closer after taking the kettle off the cooling burner you switched off his smile crept out in the cupping of your face, “Thank you, for telling her. I had just guessed it was getting to know you sparked an urge to fight harder in her. Now I get it, who she was hoping to get to know.” His free hand lowering to your middle again as he chuckled again before planting his lips on yours again melting more into the kiss at your arms wrapping around his neck. Forgetting the tea you were set on the table and he purred against your lips, “Any other sort of, limitations my Darling?”

You shook your head then giggled at his lifting you to take you to bed in another fiery kiss. In the aftermath he laid awake too excited to sleep looking through the listings of the cottages nearby for sale with one he grinned at knowing in your time before filming in the states you had stared at that house longingly each time you passed it. With a spreading grin he sent off a message to his agent to send a message on his behalf stating a full price offer first thing in the morning imagining how thrilled you would be when he told you.

.

That next night after a family lunch together you were off to dinner together for that long awaited first date starting up a week long string of nights out together each followed by an early morning walk. Saturday rolled around and far more eager than you had seen him for the early morning taking you from his arms he hopped out of bed tapping your legs, “I’ll grab your jeans.”

Squinting up at him you sighed laying your head down, “Since when are you this chipper to be torn from bed?”

A pile of clothes was set at your feet making you lift your head again as he dropped his sweats to the ground, “Come on, picked them out last night. Can’t keep our guy waiting.”

With a brow inched up you exhaled and sat up easing your legs from under the covers to start getting dressed watching him hopping into his jeans after his socks were tugged on. Hastily he added his shirt and moved in as you raised your shirt to kiss your belly and greet the twins shifting under his hand in his move to help you add your socks and sneakers on after he made sure to double knot ensuring you wouldn’t trip.

Out to the kitchen he fixed up a simple breakfast while Gimli snacked on his glancing between you catching onto your confusion. Once the dishes were in the sink his hand settled on yours, claiming Gimli’s leash he secured and then led you outside. The walk went as usual past the diversion leading you on the long way back again conveniently past your dream cottage. Stopping at the driveway with the automated gate sitting open he eyed the sold sign and smirked, “We should take a look.”

You pointed at the sign, “It’s sold already.” Your brows pressed together disbelievingly muttering, “It barely had the sign up at all.”

His head tilted and he started to walk down the driveway guiding you along by the hand, “Come on, Love.”

Following him you softly said, “Rich.”

He chuckled, “It’s not like anyone’s going to argue with us stealing a peek.”

“Rich.” He chuckled again guiding you along through the front garden path after the long curved drive adding to its privacy as Gimli sniffed around excitedly. A few feet from the door you glanced around then said, “Rich. What if the owners show up?”

He turned to you, “They’re not going to mind.”

“Oh really? Two people-,”

He drew his hand from his pocket dangling a pair of keys on the ring with an open mouthed gasp at you making your mouth drop open as he playfully stated, “Oh, just two people?” He chuckled blindly unlocking the door he opened for you both and Gimli, who trotted inside as you released the leash. Moving closer he purred scooping you up in his arms, “This is your dream cottage, my Love. Let me show you around.” Carrying you inside to set you down and close the door behind you guiding you through each room.

“I know yours came furnished past the bed, so, sold the flat and I’ve been moving my things in, not much for furniture, mainly got it all set up with plenty of room for us to fill in the gaps how you like it.” Wetting his lips he opened yet another door that made you cover your mouth with your hands at the fully set up nursery, “Me and Mum managed to set it all up. Just how you had planned it while you were off at work.”

Peering up at him his lips parted at your tear filled eyes only to curl into a smile at your arms rising to settle on his shoulders, “Get down here.” Chuckling weakly he lowered down and helped to close the distance melting into your tight embrace and following kiss. In a break for air you asked, “How long have you been plotting this?”

“Since I came home and spotted that for sale sign outside. Knew I had to have it for us. If you like while you’re at work me and Chris can pack up your place and we can just wait out the month lease giving notice to the owners it’s open again.”

Wetting your lips you asked, “So, whose mattress are we keeping?”

He chuckled saying, “I know yours is more comfortable, even though I have to curl up on it. Though I hope you don’t mind.” He said guiding you down the hall to the next room over, opening the door he continued revealing the larger version of your mattress on a platform bed frame you had mentioned wanting with drawers under it. “I bought a bigger one for the both of us with the frame you wanted.”

Again you kissed him and giggled at his guiding you to the bed, “You just planned it all.”

He shook his head, “Not all of it, Love. Plenty for us to find out for our home together. First, to test it.” Making you giggle again and ease your arms around him in the kiss he planted onto your neck in his move to mold around you.

.

Months bled by and a sudden trip to the hospital in your second month off of filming you were surrounded by joyful tears at the twins giving their first cry. All chances possible were taken for the increased family to gather around them until around another bed the family split in the most debilitating way. Over a year of painful battling had come to an end leaving the family to crumble together in their muddled anguish. Averted attention and focus on what mattered around them, the growing children still in need a rock bottom was found and everyone soldiered on.

First words blurred into first steps and eventually the pair were tottering about with their first birthday on the way. Another in a growing list of events that empty seat continued to stab at their hearts. But as time carried on so did you, helping one another through your harshest days and reminding one another of the good times to come to continue on the path ahead. Back from a final bout of filming Richard flopped into bed after his long flight eager to snuggle around you again waiting until the boys were awake to hold them after a two month trip away. In his plotting daydreams of waking you to a steady trail of lips along your neck he woke alone in the plushy comforter covered bed only to grin at Gimli in his peek over the mattress confirming he was awake to alert the other with a soft bark.

Tiny feet followed with a clamber of pajama clad boys stirring a roll onto his back widening his grin in their move to cuddle across his chest through his deep chuckle at their joint, “Happy Daddy Day!!”

Teary eyed he replied between pecks on their foreheads, “Thank you boys.” His eyes rose to you still in his sweater you had stolen a year prior while still heavily pregnant with tray in hand you carried over to him while they both presented him the large card you handed them coated in crayon scribbles and doodles.

Wider and wider his smile grew reading the words you had written out for the boys in their attempt at a poem on how much they loved him ending with , “Love Always, Mummy, Gimli, Thorin, Crispin,” his brows pressed together saying, “And there’s a 3.”

With giggles their hands rose to their mouths, both boys stating, “It’s a little 3.”

Richard chuckled repeating, “Little 3? Just who might that be?”

His eyes turning to you as the boys did giggling, “Mummy!”

You giggled smiling at him pointing at the boys and then settling your hand on your stomach making Richard gasp and set the tray aside on the nightstand scooping you all up in his arms kissing each of you, “I love it. Thank you boys. Why don’t you both go pick out your toys you’re taking to grandpa’s today. We’ll be in in a little bit to help you dress.”

They giggled moving in to kiss his cheeks, “Love you Daddy!” then raced back to their room as he called back, “I love you more!”

His eyes turned to you smoothing across your stomach not even rounded yet purring, “You and that determined ovary of yours.” His smirk split at the tremble of his lip while tears flooded his eyes knowing just who he wanted to tell, who he would have to go without being able to call through this child’s life. Steadily you folded around him silently crying yourself as he quietly wept into your chest for a few minutes until he sniffled and peered up at you tightening his fingers around the sweater covering your back in his tight hold around you, “I love you. More than you will ever know. We can do this.” In a try at a playful purr he added, “It is quite adorable, little 3.”

Making you giggle, “It is.”

He wet his lips, “You told dad?”

You nodded, “Had to. The boys are terrible with secrets.”

Making him chuckle, “Yes they are. He have any ideas on names?”

You nodded again, “He had one in mind.”

Without having to ask he knew what it was. On your feet you dressed as he turned back to his breakfast then rose to help you dress the boys and take them to John’s where Richard filled in all the traditional meal and actions with the boys brightening his day greatly along with his sharing what he had held back from Richard for the couple weeks since you had discovered the truth behind your late mornings.

Another flurry of films and another season and film premier for you had passed until a sudden trip to the same hospital. All around the bed the family huddled as you sat up with an orange blanket from your first birth filled with a wide eyed little girl all too eager to peer up at those around her. Tears and smiles were common sight as the name on the tiny ankle band was read by all, _‘Suzi Margaret Armitage.’_


End file.
